TONE MAGAZINE – DECEMBER ARTICLE - 1
Dignity 101.com: New Year Resolution with a Twist
December has descended upon us like a crash landing! With all the rain and the warmer weather, it almost comes as a surprise. Year end is now around the corner and with it comes that time of introspection - what will the New Year’s Resolution be this time?
Like well seasoned resolution builders, we start to scan what we disapprove of in our selves and make a plan of self-attack under the guise of a New Year’s Resolution. Sounds familiar?
Then the joke is always: how long will it take before I break said resolution?
Here’s a twist. How would you feel about looking for what is positive about you and focusing on making that better next year? What if the New Year’s Resolution is to learn to give up guilt?
What about if, instead of criticizing being out of shape, your weight, or your smoking habit – as examples – you simply own it. Relax about it and instead of wanting to impose the best guilt-trip you can on yourself, you simply accept the fact that you are not perfect – and that’s ok.
Let’s take smoking as an example. Instead of trying to quit, why not figure out why you do it in the first place? If it’s because you enjoy it, then own that. If it’s because it calms you down, own that. If it’s just out of habit, own that – all without judgment. Are you as interested in smoking when there is no guilt and judgment involved? You won’t know until you try.
At the same time, also own the side effects of habits considered to be “bad” for you. Smoking, again as an example, can be a cause for lung issues in the future. Those who have come for reflexology in my practice, who had been heavy smokers, and who had to force-quit due to serious lung issues didn’t heal very well. Illness set in in the late sixties and early seventies. Can you think that far ahead?
One blockage to the healing process is how much they beat down on themselves, continuously, about having smoked as much as they did. There was a lot of regret and guilt. They seemed to suffer more than non-smokers and their pain was greater. Own that possibility too. Not as a guilt trip but as one of the factors to consider. If the side effects are worth it to you, own that.
Self-renewal starts when you take ownership of where you’re at and why, without judgment. So this year, why not try total self-acceptance for who you are and where you are at right now, in this moment – without guilt – while focusing on a positive aspect of yourself? Understand that guilt is a force to contend with due to the momentum it gains through self-rejection. Self-acceptance is Soul-care.
Who is willing to join me in focusing on the positive side of yourself as a New Year’s Resolution?
This is an approach that could potentially help you bring about the changes you would like to see. It could be an introduction to the Language of the Soul hidden deep within you.
It is said that if you always do, believe and think what you’ve always done, believed and thought, you will always get what you always got. Is there a better example of this than how we set New Year’s Resolutions? How well have you succeeded by repeating the same patterns year after year? And how much guilt did you pile on yourself for not succeeding? Focusing on the positive is a different approach. Once again, you won’t know how it works until you try it!
If you need help and support, join me on a weekly basis for a six-week class, starting in January 2018. We will explore how to put a different spin on things and put an end to spiritual bankruptcy. We will study the language and interweaving of the Soul outside of religion. We will also add Indigenous teachings to the mix to help us expand our thinking horizons so that we can learn to break old thinking patterns and experience sel